I've got nothing against the Law of Attraction. I think its tenets, at their core, are exactly right and true. I know the Law of Attraction works. I know we create our reality.

So what's the problem? It's in the interpretation.

We assume, because we are human people living in human bodies on the physical plane, that life is expressed through tangibles. Through "stuff," in other words. In addition, we've just come from a good 2000 years of exploring human interaction through the lens of wealth and material goods accumulation that's led us to where we are now, in a world filled with flat-screen TVs and cell phones and cars. And all this stuff we have makes us want more. We want what others have.

And if it's not actual tangible stuff we want, we want something so ephemeral we can't even quite describe it. It seems out of our grasp. Happiness. That's what we want. We want to be happy.

What is happiness? Your answer to that is going to be different than mine. All our answers differ based on our unique lenses of perception, experiences we've had, and soul-level plans for what we wish to do in this life.

There's nothing fundamentally wrong with wanting happiness. Except ... I'd much rather HAVE happiness than WANT it. Wouldn't you?

I recently came in contact with a person who was using the Law of Attraction, he said, to create the life he wanted. He felt strongly emotionally connected to someone he had met and wished a life with her. Problem was, there were problems. Logistics. Major logistical problems, at least in his opinion. Reality didn't match the fantasy. So he decided to spend his time and energy crafting, in his mind, all the details of the life he did want, one without those logistical problems. The key was in the details, he thought, and he thought that the Law of Attraction said that successful manifestation comes from creating the world you want through minute details. He became attached to this dream and wanted to live in it. Life otherwise didn't seem worth living.

Problems with the Law of Attraction

Problem was — well, there were two problems.

Conflicting internal beliefs. You can want something all day long, but if you hold a core belief that conflicts with that desire, you will always prevent yourself from having it. Want a million dollars? Great! But if you believe, deep down inside you, that you don't deserve a million dollars, or that nothing comes without a price, or that people with money are shallow, guess what? Those core beliefs are much stronger than your desire for a million dollars, and no matter how hard you work you will always keep yourself safe from having to feel you are unworthy or paying the price or being shallow.

Emotional attachment to outcome. In my experience, when we get really attached emotionally to a particular outcome, it will never occur. It's that simple. Polaris tells people over and over, and I know this to be true myself, that when we let go of emotional attachment to a particular outcome, what we're really doing is opening up to the universe of possibilities that exist. When we're attached emotionally to an outcome, we only see the one thing, one way for the story to end. When we let go, we finally notice that there are thousands of things, thousands of endings, thousands of possibilities. Sure, some of them are less than optimal, but by entertaining possibilities, we let the universe do what it's good at: provide outcomes.

Get what you want

So, what can my friend do to get what he wants?

1. Examine core beliefs. Admittedly, this isn't easy. But core beliefs are easier to spot when they're not feeling threatened. You created them to protect you, so the easiest way to see them clearly is to allow them to come to the surface. How? By pretending you won't get what you want. Along with the feeling of fear of lack, there'll be something else. An a-ha. An "I told you so." Listen for that little voice and pay attention to what it says, because that will be your conflicting core belief. And once you know what your conflicting core belief is, you can welcome it, thank it for doing its job to protect it, then work on releasing it. (Want help with this? My next post will be on releasing core beliefs, so stay tuned.)

2. Let go. Seriously, let go. How? My friend, he wants to be something else and he wants it so badly he can taste it. The next step, then, is to play a game I like to call Worst Case Scenario. We use it in this instance to see what it feels like to NOT HAVE the thing that we want.

Let's go back to your million dollars: to play Worst Case Scenario, imagine what it's like to not have a million dollars. Likely you are already good at imagining this, since if you already knew what it was like to have a million dollars this whole thing wouldn't be an issue.

But take it further. Say you decide that you need a million dollars to pay off your mortgage (things have been a little tight, anyway), send your kids to college, give to some charities, and set you up for retirement. Then go down all those roads in your mind. Really allow yourself to FEEL what it would feel like to struggle paying your mortgage. Perhaps you'd even lose your house. Feel what it would feel like to be unable to help your kids with college. Maybe it would prevent them from going to college entirely. How would you feel? What would it feel like to not be the big-shot philanthropist you've been wanting to be? What would people think of you then? And what would it feel like to have no money for retirement and to struggle financially whan you're older, maybe even becoming homeless just when you thought you'd be taking it easy?

Really feel all those things. Let your fears come up and let tears come if they're there. And then ... take a break from your million dollars. Decide you won't bring it up with yourself for at least two weeks.

What happens when you let go

When you truly let go, you create flow from the other possibilities that are already there. You find out things like maybe it wasn't the million dollars you wanted after all. Maybe it was the feeling of being able to give to others. And you'll find yourself creating ways you can do that. When you let go, you open up to the true creative powers you already have. By playing Worst Case Scenario, you allow yourself to examine the fears you have about not having. And once you do that, it's easier to go from wanting to actually having.

Wanting vs. Having

Wanting implies lack. Feelings of lack all come from fear. Having is all about, well, having. Abundance. Completeness. And if you truly welcome and embrace all that you are in this moment, you will never feel lack. Change your perception, then, so that you feel you already have what it is you want. I'm not suggesting you go out now and spend that million dollars you don't have. On the contrary, doing that only cements within you the idea that you DON'T have a million dollars. You can't trick yourself into believing there are suddenly several extra zeros on your bank balance. But you CAN imagine that you FEEL like you have a million dollars.

In Worst Case Scenario you uncovered your fears about not having what you wanted, and in doing so you also found out what it was you truly wanted. Maybe it was security. Maybe it was feeling you're important to others. Maybe it was being thought of as a giving person. Whatever it was, it was something you can feel now. So do that. Find small ways, little things, that make you feel secure or important or giving. The rest will write itself.

Making it work for you

Is any of this easy? Yes and no. It really is simple. But we resist simplicity sometimes. We think that the difficult things are more worth having (yes, that's a common conflicting core belief!). We find it easier to rest in our fears or the protections we built for ourselves than to move out of them. That's normal. It's human. But here's a challenge. Is there something you've been wanting? Then try, just for now, releasing on your core beliefs and letting go of emotional attachments. And when you've done that, try feeling you already have what it is you want (now that you know what that really is). It won't hurt to try. And see what happens.

You're more powerful at this creating stuff than you realize.

TrackBack URI for this entry

Comments (2)

Subscribe to this comment's feed

...
written by Oscar - freestyle mind, September 11, 2009

Yes interpretation is everything. I personally prefer to follow the giving - having - wanting because I think we all have to give before to get

Amazing
written by Nazim Khimani, September 23, 2009

This is just what I was looking for. I'm definitely going to spend a few hours reconstructing ALL of my fundamental beliefs this weekend when I get time. I think it'll change anything.

Name

Email

Website

Title

Comment

smaller | bigger

Subscribe via email (Registered users only)

Add Comment